Accepting Changes

Everyone will be writing review of their year in 2013 and their goals of 2014 online. I would write about my year but it's already on my blog. Here is a small video that you can check out out my year in review for 2013 by clicking here. My goals for 2014 is something that I will keep in my journal.There is a lot that I would like to accomplish in 2014 but I would like to keep it private. I want change in 2014 in my life.

I will share my dad's writings about three changes that occurs in our lives: Natural, Self Induced (brought on by oneself or itself) & Uncontrollable Changes. This will make you think about you life this past year in 2013 and help you plan your goals for next year in 2014.

My dad, J D Rodriguez wrote this on 01.05.2000****************************************

Writing the year 2000 on our checkbooks, Daylight Savings Time, Graying, Loosing/Making Friends, Loosing Hair, Loosing your figure, Kids growing up, The weather, Your Memory not being the same, Spending & Making Money.

Matthew18:13, “And he said, “ I tell you the truth, unless you Change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

Changes comes when we least expect them. Changes come through many ways. Some changes we accept them while others we reject them initially. God put animals on this earth so we could learn much from them. If they could talk, I'm sure we would know more information about ourselves regarding change. There are three type of changes of which includes Nature Change, Self-Induced Changes, and the Uncontrollable Changes. We mostly accept the Natural and the Self-Induced Changes except when there is a conflict with other human relationships. The final kind of change, which is the Uncontrollable, become a decision we have to make whether we accept the or reject them.

Natural Changes

Live Right ( Everyone accept a good man)

Prov. 16:7 “ When a man's way are pleasing to the LORD, he makes even his enemies live at peace with him.

Self-Induced Changes

All seem to be lifestyle inflicted of which can be bad or good:

Positive: Setting positive goals, exercising, good diet, making each day count, living to the server instead of serving to live, keeping positive NO MATTER WHAT, & knowing your place with God/family/friends/and habits

Negative: Gambling, drinking (too much of drinking) hating, mindless music, cursing, living fast, spending trying to keep up with the Jone's, not loving to love but living to putting trust on possessions ( material) instead of God and loved ones, treating people as things instead of living breathing beings, living an immortal lifestyle ( No).

UNCONTROLLABLE CHANGES:

ILLNESS, AGING, DEATH, TAXES, I'm sure we can mention others like visiting the MOTHER IN LAW (my dad loved his Mother in Law, Maria) unwanted Relatives, hurtful friends like BILLS, Etc. But Seriously, I was young and had a great job in Sales when I was called into my managers office. My wife was 8 months pregnant (with me) and I got laid off. After laying around feeling sorry myself, it took courage to find another job because of my PRIDE/ my expectations/my success story/my routine had been ripped apart. That experience was a turning point in my life. It taught me well to always prepare for the unexpected. (my dad was laid off several times in his career.)

Things we can learn from animals regarding changes:

1. They're born without being cuddled and wrapped in a blanket or a nice soft pillow to rest on. ( My dog Gigi ( Toy Poodle), always sat on a nice pillow on the family couch)
2. Many Species have to do their own work in their birth instead of the mother pushing them out.
3. Their weaning period from their mothers can be instantly, days or just a few months.
4. No one knows when a sparrow dies except God and their parents.
5. Animals don't call their parents or their siblings on Holidays.
6. Sometimes it's hard to tell when they're sad, hurting, cold or even dying.

A mind set that can help you with unwanted changes:

1. Realize change do not have to ask you for permission to come. They come regardless.
2. You can not stop change. YOU ARE NOT IN CHARGE BUT Change is in charge.
3. It's how you direct the change to flow where you want it to flow.
4. Do not just see, hear,feel, taste change but ask yourself, “ Why Am I am so special that I can not accept this change?”
5. Lastly, the very first step in knowing how to handle change is knowing you have change standing right in from of you!

Must Have Make Up for All Holiday Parties

Every girl needs to look good for all the holiday parties this year. I have researched from drug store to high end stores for the best make up. I found that if you spend a little money on a few items then your make up is flawless for the holiday parties. I'm not a make up artist but I have learned to find the best products. Also, I have asked a few make up artists for advice. I am giving away some of my secrets to all lovely ladies! Enjoy!

Before your big party prepare your face with these products weeks in advance. I had really bad adult acne weeks ago.I had called my cousin who is a make up artist to advise me really good products at Origins since I couldn’t see the dermatologist. I have to say these products actually worked for me! I was shy taking pictures at my cousin's wedding in the beginning of November. I was not shy taking pictures at a big event in Dallas last weekend.

See the difference:

Mom & I

After, I had used the products:

These are the products that I had used:

You need a good moisture and a primer:

You need good tools to apply you make up: Try Sephora make up brushes. The cost is about $60 but it's worth it. You need eye liner brush,concealer brush, lip liner brush, blush brush and other brushes to apply your make up.

Clinique Superblanced Make Up. This foundation sops up skin with Biopol, a milk-derived protein. “ My face stayed matte until the evening.,” said one tester. It contain chamomile extract to help reduce redness. I love this product. I have very sensitive skin and this is the best foundation for your face. This cost is about $23 each bottle. Best foundation to use at holiday parties. 

Cheapest mascara you find under $10! Use water proof mascara! This is the best mascara for your $$$!

Best power you will ever spend! Loose Shimmer power:

Best Eyebrow kit and very inexpensive!! You find this eye brow kit at Target or your local drug store. I have seen eyebrow kits that cost more that $60. This eye brow kit is less than $10. Tip: Make sure you find someone who can wax or threading your eyebrows before the big event:

Excellent lip stick and moisture for your lips that will last for hours. Trust me your lip stick will last more than 24 hours!

My favorite eye liner:

Don't forgot to curl your eye lashes.Tip:Use eye lashes curler under the blow dryer for 1 minute before curling your eyelashes.

This eye lashes curler is from Revlon

This is best concealer to use under your eyes. I used this every day. I have used other concealers in the past but this is the best product for your $$$. I have a very busy schedule and you can't tell that I have tired looking eyes.

Secret Camouflage Concealer

Undercover pot concealer

A must have blush product for all the holiday parties There are 4 different blushes that will last all night long. When you take a close up picture you blush is flawless. I have used this product for years. I haven't found another blush product like this product.Pink Mosaic is called.

Eye shadow kit to have in your purse. I am very simple when it comes to eye shadow. You can find this eye shadow kit at Victoria Secrets for about $18.

Thanksgiving & Christmas 2013

Thanksgiving is this week. Black Friday is the best deals of the year. What I will be doing this Black Friday is working instead of shopping. Black Friday is one events of the year we wait for the good deals. For me Black Friday is just another day. When I was younger, I would be that crazy person waking up 5am. I will be waking 6am getting to work. I have become a person who is willing to skip the Black Friday events. When my father passed away, Thanksgiving & Christmas was not the same for all of us. It's been hard enough to get my mom to get the tree up last year but she got the tree up. The old tree is gone and a new Christmas tree is up now in our family home.

Last year, we wrote a letter to each family member of how thankful we were for each other. My dad started this tradition many years ago. Presents are for the kiddos and less of us. This year, we are starting a family tradition by giving one gift to each adult family member. Christmas has become a marketing tool for America. Just turn on your TV. You will see every commercial during prime time talking about Christmas or open up your mail box with a bunch of Christmas ads. It's hard enough to see families who are struggling this year. There are others who are trying to save for next year with our health insurance, 401k, retirement, a new beginning in 2014, trying to survive for the next pay check or looking for a job. It's hard to see Christmas for a celebration with finding that perfect gift for your love one. I understand. I have been committed to help others especially during this time. If it's a Dollar Store gift, volunteer event, toy drive then I'm there in my free time. Material is less what I desire for myself and thinking of those who can't afford gifts for their child. What would Jesus do when I think to myself?

Christmas is the celebration of Jesus. When I think of Christmas as kid which I would think of toys. I also think of my dad opening the Bible and reading of birth of Christ to us. My dad taught us Thanksgiving & Christmas is celebration of family but above all Jesus. 

Three years later...

I was being interviewed by a local organization this past summer. One of the questions the interviewer asked me, “ How did you cope with the loss of you father from colon cancer 2 years ago?” I had to think very deeply for a second because I had almost cried before  I answered the question.

I had told the interviewer, “I had saw a counselor at school, I had my family around me, I did not drink any alcohol beverages during that period of time and Lord was my strength."

Three years of missing my father. I grew up from a child who was at age of 30 years old to a strong woman who feels like she is 80 years old inside at the age of 32. 

I was looking back at a picture of me in the hospital. My hair was falling out. I didn't do my hair for many weeks. I didn't sleep or eat very well. I had wore the same clothes for days while in the hospital with my dad. I was in deep depression. Each night, I had held my father's hand. I didn't want to let go my daddy's hand. I want to hold my dad's hand forever. I finally had to let go my daddy's hand when he passed away on September 14, 2011.

Two weeks ago, I had taken a picture of me in downtown Austin.The Lord is my strength for two years. It was a very difficult road to battle depression in my grieving seasons. Prayer and talking to the Lord was my only hope. There were times when I felt alone. I didn't know who to talk to during those times. I would turn up Kari Jobe's song and cried to the Father in Heaven in my car. The Lord was my salvation. Ladies, I didn't turn to my guy for a hug during those painful times. I was alone and I had to battle my depression.

Today, I am strong. My past experience was a battle to make me a stronger woman in everything I do. Don't get me wrong but I had sad moments but I continued to live my life. I lived my life to be there for my family and others. If you have a family member who is dealing with cancer or have passed away, please look to the Lord. Your strength is the Lord.

Psalms 23

“1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. 2 He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, 3 he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. 4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. 5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. 6 Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever”

In Memory of Kidd Kraddick & Tom Dooley

There are two DJs in my life that I enjoyed listening to Tom Dooley & Kid Kraddick. These DJs reminded me a little of my father, Dan. When I moved away for the first time from my childhood home, Tom Dooley would encouraged me on the radio with the Word in 2008 each day. I did my best to be independent & not call my dad every morning. 

Sometimes, I would listen to Tom Dooley on ITunes while I worked on my studies. Tom Dooley had passed away on November 9, 2010 with brain cancer. I remembered telling my dad our favorite DJ who passed away. Dad reacted with sadness.Tom Dooley was part of my life & my dad's life each day. 

1^st Annual Tom Dooley's Memorial Gold Tournament on September 14, 2013. I will volunteer for the event in memorial of my dad, Dan.

http://www.mastermedia.org/mm/eventInfo

I would listened to Kidd Kraddick each morning to laugh. There were times I didn't agreed with Kidd but I accepted him as he was on the radio. He made me laugh while I was grieving for my dad last year. There would be times I would turn off the radio because I didn't agree with Kidd on certain topics or I couldn't stand what they were talking about that morning but I always came back to listen to Kidd's show. 

I was driving to work last Monday, I heard Kidd do a segment of the show call Dying Dead Bed Confession. It was hard to listen to this part of the show. I heard Kidd Kraddick making fun of Kellie at the end of segment of the show. It's funny but difficult to listen. It's surreal to hear Kidd passed away after doing that radio segment of the show last Monday. 

http://www.dallasnews.com/entertainment/headlines/20130728-days-before-his-death-kidd-kraddick-spoke-about-deathbed-confessions-i-ve-got-a-few-minutes-to-live.ece 

What do the listeners do now? Go somewhere else to listen another family morning crew in morning? All of us come from different backgrounds but I know one thing we have common is Kidd Kraddick & the morning crew. 

To listen Kidd Kraddick online  http://www.kiddnation.com/

1^st concert will be held on August 15, 2013 with the Jonas Brothers at House of Blues for the terminal ill kiddos. Come and support the kiddos! 

http://www.kiddskids.com/  Kidd Kraddick's foundation

Remember life is short but our days are numbered. We all need to leave our legacy like these great DJs. Do something great with your life. Focus on the helping the hurting. Don't waste your time hating on others or hurting folks with your negative words. Do something positive like Kidd & Tom Dooley as they did with their lives. Remember to look up & focus our hearts on the Father above, Jesus. All of us will be called home one day.

Summer of 2013

I had promised myself this summer would be different for me. I would visit the people that I love.

Memorial day was staying at home trip with my family. We had celebrate Memorial Day with my nieces and Clifford. We had the best time at Joe Pool Lake.

I had started off to go to a Hot Rod show in Arkansas with my guy, Clifford. There were so many cars to love at this car show.

Two weeks after the car show. I had decided to go on a road trip with my mom to South Texas. We were enjoying San Antonio for the first time as mother and daughter. We made some good memories!

Then it was time to visit papa and the farm during the week of Father's Day. I haven't been to my grandfather's farm about 2 years. It was a very restful time with my grandfather and his family. One thing that touched me during that trip is praying for my grandfather on Father's Day. I was in tears and so was my 92 year old grandfather. I was praying and thanking the Lord for my papa. The Lord revealed to me that my grandfather was a father to the fatherless.

A few weeks later, I was off to another road to a trip to Abilene to visit my friend. I haven't been to Abilene but it was the best trip to a small town with a lot of relaxing moments.

One month to go before summer is over. I still have at least one or two trips left to travel. I will included them later in this blog.

Also, this summer, I am making major changes in my life with money and focus on my retirement. I have been watching the people around make changes in their lives. It is motivating me to step in that area. I am not getting young any time soon. Going shopping is not fun as it used to be for me. I am starting to see that saving and building my retirement right now is important. More to come in my blog about this subject.

The fall season will bring a new season for me. See you online after August, 2013.

Iamisleen

Haunted by the word cancer

Angelina Jolie's story came out on May 14, 2013 of her having double mastectomy. I can relate to Angelina Jolie. She is 37 years old and I am 32 years old. Angelina lost her mom at the age of 56. I had lost my dad at the age of 57 to colon cancer. She had lost her mom a few years ago. I had lost my dad to cancer 2 years ago. I was thinking what if cancer happens to me. I'm not claiming cancer at all. It's hard to think when you have a love one who had passed away from cancer. All the doctor visits you went with your love one. You had to watch all the chemo your love one went through. It is pain in our hearts.

You would say to yourself, “NO!” I don't want cancer to happen to me. I don't want to live in fear but it is hard to thinking about it. I had some issues in my body recently. I will not go in detail of my issue. This is a private matter for me. This issue wouldn't stop for about a month. I was worried about this issue in my body. Here I am reading Web MD and many online articles of what the cause of this issue in my body each night. One article stated to consult with your doctor since this issue can cause cancer. I was freaking out after reading the article online. I didn't want to tell my mom or my sister. We went through enough crap with my dad. So, I had decided to speak to my boyfriend about this issue in my body. My boyfriend said, “Go to the doctor's office tomorrow.” I did. My doctor had taken a few tests to see what the cause of this issue in my body is. She had looked at me and said, “I don't see anything wrong.” One thing she said to me, “You are healthy young person.” Her words brought life to me. The doctor told me if this issue does not stop please go to another doctor’s office. My doctor handed me business card. After I left her office, I was asking the Lord to heal. I was crying inside and outside. I didn't want to do extra blood work. I was scared for the outcome if I did extra blood work.
A week later, everything was normal in body. I said Amen to myself!!!


Fear of not living. We can say I'm ready to go to Heaven. This is what my dad said when he was normal. When he had cancer he didn't want to die. He didn't want to leave his family that he loved soooo much. My dad knew in his heart that he couldn't change the course of his life. I'm oldest daughter to be involved with cancer awareness. This week, I have decided to become involve in Be The Match at http://m.marrow.org/. I am going to give myself to be a match for patients with leukemia or other forms of cancer. I'm taking the step to help others.

Also, Angelina Jolie's story makes me wonder if I need to do blood work to see if I will get cancer. I'm considering it. Maybe, in my next doctor visit this coming August. I have to fight the rest of my life of this ugly word call cancer mentality.

Iamisleen


Angelina Jolie's Story

We often speak of “Mommy’s mommy,” and I find myself trying to explain the illness that took her away from us. They have asked if the same could happen to me. I have always told them not to worry, but the truth is I carry a “faulty” gene, BRCA1, which sharply increases my risk of developing breast cancer and ovarian cancer.

My doctors estimated that I had an 87 percent risk of breast cancer and a 50 percent risk of ovarian cancer, although the risk is different in the case of each woman.

Only a fraction of breast cancers result from an inherited gene mutation. Those with a defect in BRCA1 have a 65 percent risk of getting it, on average.

Once I knew that this was my reality, I decided to be proactive and to minimize the risk as much I could. I made a decision to have a preventive double mastectomy. I started with the breasts, as my risk of breast cancer is higher than my risk of ovarian cancer, and the surgery is more complex.

On April 27, I finished the three months of medical procedures that the mastectomies involved. During that time I have been able to keep this private and to carry on with my work.

But I am writing about it now because I hope that other women can benefit from my experience. Cancer is still a word that strikes fear into people’s hearts, producing a deep sense of powerlessness. But today it is possible to find out through a blood test whether you are highly susceptible to breast and ovarian cancer, and then take action.

My own process began on Feb. 2 with a procedure known as a “nipple delay,” which rules out disease in the breast ducts behind the nipple and draws extra blood flow to the area. This causes some pain and a lot of bruising, but it increases the chance of saving the nipple.

Two weeks later I had the major surgery, where the breast tissue is removed and temporary fillers are put in place. The operation can take eight hours. You wake up with drain tubes and expanders in your breasts. It does feel like a scene out of a science-fiction film. But days after surgery you can be back to a normal life.

Nine weeks later, the final surgery is completed with the reconstruction of the breasts with an implant. There have been many advances in this procedure in the last few years, and the results can be beautiful.

I wanted to write this to tell other women that the decision to have a mastectomy was not easy. But it is one I am very happy that I made. My chances of developing breast cancer have dropped from 87 percent to under 5 percent. I can tell my children that they don’t need to fear they will lose me to breast cancer.

It is reassuring that they see nothing that makes them uncomfortable. They can see my small scars and that’s it. Everything else is just Mommy, the same as she always was. And they know that I love them and will do anything to be with them as long as I can. On a personal note, I do not feel any less of a woman. I feel empowered that I made a strong choice that in no way diminishes my femininity.

I am fortunate to have a partner, Brad Pitt, who is so loving and supportive. So to anyone who has a wife or girlfriend going through this, know that you are a very important part of the transition. Brad was at the Pink Lotus Breast Center, where I was treated, for every minute of the surgeries. We managed to find moments to laugh together. We knew this was the right thing to do for our family and that it would bring us closer. And it has.

For any woman reading this, I hope it helps you to know you have options. I want to encourage every woman, especially if you have a family history of breast or ovarian cancer, to seek out the information and medical experts who can help you through this aspect of your life, and to make your own informed choices.

I acknowledge that there are many wonderful holistic doctors working on alternatives to surgery. My own regimen will be posted in due course on the Web site of the Pink Lotus Breast Center. I hope that this will be helpful to other women.

Breast cancer alone kills some 458,000 people each year, according to the World Health Organization, mainly in low- and middle-income countries. It has got to be a priority to ensure that more women can access gene testing and lifesaving preventive treatment, whatever their means and background, wherever they live. The cost of testing for BRCA1 and BRCA2, at more than $3,000 in the United States, remains an obstacle for many women.

I choose not to keep my story private because there are many women who do not know that they might be living under the shadow of cancer. It is my hope that they, too, will be able to get gene tested, and that if they have a high risk they, too, will know that they have strong options.

Life comes with many challenges. The ones that should not scare us are the ones we can take on and take control of.

She didn't give up in life

As children we talk about our parents to others. When I talk to people about my mom which I tell them she works for huge auto industry company at the age of 57. She is a single lady. She likes to shop like me and do her hair. Then, I show my colleagues or my friends my mom's picture & me. One colleague looked at me with confusion. She didn't want to pick out the wrong lady in the picture. I told her it was the lady on the far right. She said to me, “ Is that your mom?” I told her yes! My mom is not a old lady with gray hair sitting around with her rocking chair. My mom is a mover and shaker. My mom did not give up in life when the storms came through. My mom went through a lot of hell when she lost her husband. My dad was her soulmate. When I see my mom alone. I just want to hug her or go watch a movie with her. I hate to see my mom alone. My mom met my dad when she was 16 years old. My parents had issues in their marriage but they continued their love story like the Simpsons. My mom was like Marge Simpson and dad was like Homer Simpson. My dad liked the sweet foods. Dad made crazy mistakes. Mom was like Marge trying to save the family from the silly mistakes Homer made.

Then, Homer Simpson which was my dad passed away. Can you imagine what the show would be like without Homer Simpson? The show would be cancelled. The show was not cancelled in our real life.

Well, the blue hair lady continued her life with her children. I'm Lisa Simpson the oldest. My brother Mark is Bart Simpson. Sarah is Maggie, the baby. The blue hair lady is not crying her eyes out or depressed at home without Homer Simpson. She is strong and living the life. The blue hair lady just went to Florida with Selma ( her best sister in law- Mona). Selma is a pretty woman in real life.

So this blue hair lady continues to help her coworkers at work. She puts parties together during lunch times. The blue hair lady talks to her 91 year old father, Grandpa Abraham ( Papa). The blue hair lady babysitting her grand children. The blue hair lady dresses in her best and goes to church. The blue hair lady sometimes she misses being next to her Homer Simpson in church. The blue hair lady says she is trusting in the Lord. The blue hair lady is making major decisions in the next few years of her life.The Blue hair lady didn't give up with her dreams. The blue hair lady is still moving and loving her family each day. This blue hair lady is one amazing mama to me and my family. We love this blue hair lady waited a minute she has brown hair. My mom is not Marge Simpson. Her name is Emily. She loves red roses. This brown hair lady is my mom. Happy Mother's Day!

Iamisleen